![Adventures in Late-Night Commuting on the A-train
A Play in One Act
SCENE: A young woman sits on a bench on a subway platform, reading the NY Times & diligently attempting to decipher Maureen Dowd’s latest transmission from outer space.
A pack of rowdy, drunken young men (Genus: Meathead Americanus; Species: Juido [i.e. Jock-Guido hybrid]) enter platform left and begin to sing the chorus of 2 Live Crew song “Hey, We Want Some Pussy” as loudly as possible.
One Juido spots our heroine and decides to engage her.
Degenerate Juido: Ssh. Ssh. Psst! Ssh! PSST!
Woman: (Is not a housepet, so she does not recognize hissing as an appropriate form of address. Erects bitchface & retreats behind newspaper. Silently admires Singaporean practice of caning drunk & disorderly hooligans.)
Degenerate Juido: (walks over) What, you don’t like that song? (to Juido compatriots) She doesn’t like our song.
Woman: …
Degenerate Juido: (laughs) I like it. You know why?
Woman: …
Degenerate Juido: Because it’s true. I just want a little pussy.
Woman: So do I. Mine’s as big as a bucket.
Silence.
Degenerate Juido retreats.
Woman goes back to newspaper.
CURTAIN](http://26.media.tumblr.com/IxtyCwgXrnceoyzdeXK4kVPCo1_r1_400.jpg)
Adventures in Late-Night Commuting on the A-train
A Play in One Act
SCENE: A young woman sits on a bench on a subway platform, reading the NY Times & diligently attempting to decipher Maureen Dowd’s latest transmission from outer space.
A pack of rowdy, drunken young men (Genus: Meathead Americanus; Species: Juido [i.e. Jock-Guido hybrid]) enter platform left and begin to sing the chorus of 2 Live Crew song “Hey, We Want Some Pussy” as loudly as possible.
One Juido spots our heroine and decides to engage her.
Degenerate Juido: Ssh. Ssh. Psst! Ssh! PSST!
Woman: (Is not a housepet, so she does not recognize hissing as an appropriate form of address. Erects bitchface & retreats behind newspaper. Silently admires Singaporean practice of caning drunk & disorderly hooligans.)
Degenerate Juido: (walks over) What, you don’t like that song? (to Juido compatriots) She doesn’t like our song.
Woman: …
Degenerate Juido: (laughs) I like it. You know why?
Woman: …
Degenerate Juido: Because it’s true. I just want a little pussy.
Woman: So do I. Mine’s as big as a bucket.
Silence.
Degenerate Juido retreats.
Woman goes back to newspaper.
CURTAIN
